I am scheduled to host an online show this afternoon in relation to the upcoming May 13, 2019 elections and here I am in my home-office corner staring at the books on my shelves. 
There is a good list of titles on the second level: Milne Shepard’s Winnie-the-Pooh, Amy Chua’s Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother, Robert Kiyosaki’s Rich Dad, Poor Dad, Jack Kerouac’s Lonesome Traveler, Pearl S. Buck’s The Good Earth, Cecilia Brainard’s Magdalena and The Newspaper Widow, and some book on potty training.
Yes, the book on how to teach my child to poop in the toilet joined these titles. Why? I have no idea. Except that this part of the house is not even an “organized chaos.” It is just chaos, a mess, a total disaster. Period.
The twins are completely independent from diapers for close to two years and we have Ate Joy to thank for that. I would love to paint myself as the just-returned-from-the-toilet type of “war hero” but the truth is, potty training the twins was not my doing.
It was Ate Joy’s.
I really find it messy.
I experimented on potty training the twins when they were two years, in the US, when it was just me, myself and I who had to change three diapers (JJ included) and do the laundry. It worked for Nicholas for a while but he reverted back to the convenience of peeing and pooping without having to go to the toilet.
We tried again in early 2017 when we moved back to Cebu, Philippines but with Ate Joy at home to help me achieve this goal, I was admittedly not that enthusiastic. I am being honest when I say that I dread the daily routine that comes with potty training my children.
Potty training books make it sound so easy and happy and breezy.
BUT IT’S NOT!
It’s smelly and messy and yuck-y!
It’s twice the mess when you have to do it with twins.
I probably bought 10 books on potty training to “prepare” myself for this stage. In my case, none of those books ever prepared for me for the practical exam. I love books, don’t get me wrong. I swear by their magical powers to convince me that fiction is reality and reality is fiction. But when it comes to the subject of potty training printed in paper, I am the first one to say, “Nope, doesn’t work.”
What I learned from Ate Joy is that potty training is a repetitive process. It has to be done again and again and again and again. When the time comes that you have to “wean” your child from diapers, you will feel a certain amount of fear in your heart.
What if they pee while they are asleep? What if they poop in their pants? Who will wash the soiled clothes?
In an effort to redeem myself, I am not really totally useless in all these. I gave Ate Joy instructions on how to go about potty training. I was the planner; she was the doer. I did the fancy lecture, while Ate Joy did the dirty work. Literally, the dirty work.
I am not apologizing for this because it is my choice.
Although my hands are not completely inexperienced in the field of cleaning up after poop mess and washing soiled clothes especially when Ate Joy had to take a two-week off to go home to her province. This was the time that I truly felt that I was a war hero.
Our youngest child, Jeff Jr., is three years old and we are in the initial stages of potty training his chubby self. This morning, as I write this entry, he was crying because he did not want to take off his diaper when he peed in the toilet. It was so noisy at 6:30 a.m. that I wished I was in some remote countryside in rural China enjoying my cup of Oolong tea.
I am a woman of little patience so when I read or hear women talk about potty training in the same way that they discuss shopping, I get annoyed.
Can a mother really get excited about potty training?
“It’s poop and pee!!! Yey!”
This does not mean that I am a total b***h in this department. Women support women, right? I am not just particularly enthusiastic about potty training. But I am quite good in hiding that from my children.
And so this season calls for another round of potty training and this time, for our dear son, JJ. I am dreading the smell and the mess. But what’s the point of being a parent when you won’t touch and smell poop? (Yeah, right!)
To anyone out there who are on the same journey as us, good luck! Read potty training books if you want but there is no other way to do it but to just do it.
